The Graduate School of Education at Northern Illinois University, DeKalb, Illinois,
recently collected a number of excuses for absence turned in by students at high 
schools around the state. A number of these are listed below (the spelling is exactly 
as it appeared on the notes.):
 
Dear School:  
    
Please eckuse John for been absent January 28, 29, 30, 32, and33.

Chris has a acre on his side.      

Mary could not come to school because she was bothered by very close veins.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taked out of his face.

Please excuse Gloria. She has been sick and under the doctor.

My son is under the doctor's care and should not take PE. Please execute him.

Lily was absent from school yesterday as she had a going over.

Please excuse Joey Friday.  He had loose vowels.

Please excuse from Blanche from Jum today.  She is administrating.

Please excuse Blanche from PE for a few days.  Yesterday she fell out of a tree 
and misplaced her hip.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football, he was hut in the 
growing part.

My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent the weekend 
with the Marines.

Please excuse Jimmy for being.  It was his father's fault.

Please excuse Dianna from being absent yesterday.  She was in bed with gramps.

Mary Ann was absent December ll-15 because she had a fever, sore throat, headache 
and upsed stomach.  Her sister was also sick, fever sore throat, her brother had a 
low grade fever and ached all over.  I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. 
There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.